the tulips are wilting

no, it's not another one of those angst-ridden posts. i actually had a pretty good weekend. rescheduled my presentation for Tuesday, and although there is a lot more to be done, i was assured by D that : [1] the rest of the studio is just as clueless about the Design Thesis as i am, and [2] i can do it, i just have to stop moping. yep. that and some lovely e.mail conversations with some lovely friends, uplifting Friendster testimonial from old high-school roommate and i.m. & phone conversations with a good friend who hardly ever lets me down (except when he makes one of his trademark megalame jokes). anyway, i also realised how often i take my friends for granted. how i always expect them to guess my mood. how i leave them confused and hurt when i act pissy, or cranky, or snippy and they have no idea why. i had a nice good talk with D on Wednesday over dinner, and it was a relief to finally get this huge load of whatever off my chest. met up with her again this afternoon (Sunday) for lunch and had further 'discussions about nothing'. friends are the best therapists, i swear.

anyway, now that that's out of the way...

i've been battling with my biorhythm these past few days. my body is convinced that bedtime is at 6am, despite constant admonishment from my head, insisting (ever so rightly) that bedtime is at 12md latest. so last night (Saturday) i decided at 2:30 to go to bed so that i could get up in time for my 12:00 meeting with D today (Sunday). and i couldn't get to sleep. every position was uncomfortable, and just about every thought whizzed through my head, among which were :
[1] why did JudeLaw and JuliaRoberts break up in Closer ?
[2] my a4 printer is out of ink again. should i order from amazon.co.uk or just get it from Dixon's ?
[3] how much does it suck that i can't get a Region2 copy of The Breakfast Club ?
[4] how many more days of clean underwear do i have ?
[5] i need new shower gel

so i tried counting sheep. except, i remembered that this never did work for me when i was little, so why should it work now ? i decided to solve math problems in my head instead. started small and simple, like 3x2, or 3+5, simple kindy-level stuff. then i progressed to a more advanced (3rd grade) stage : 24x72. 5 multiplication tables later i dozed off. and in that half-asleep stage i had 2 dreams. first, i dreamt that Blogger wanted to discontinue my account because i had abandoned my blog. i went to see Mr.Blogger (who looked v much like BillGates with a beard). he was wearing a red plaid shirt and a cowboy hat. i pleaded with him to let me keep my account, and i promised that i'd update more frequently. then i had a CSI-like dream where i found a ketchup-covered boot at the crime scene of a murder and was handing it in to evidence for tests. GilGrissom (eww) was there and everything. plus we caught the bad guy in the end.

finally fell asleep at 6:00.

well right now it's half-1 and i'm thinking that i'm done playing around with my bio-rhythm. from now on i'll let it have its way. until i head over to Boots and get me some sleeping pills.

now playing : Swiss Army Romance by Dashboard Confessional from their MTV Unplugged album

Things You May / May Not Know About Me pt.ii

This post made me think of a few more Things About Me. so, continuing the list, here's pt.ii :

[39] i used to be able to whistle real well, until my teeth got straightened out : skill traded for aesthetics
[40] when i get (really) drunk i end all my sentences with either "man" or "dude" (assuming, of course, that the unintelligible string of words that come out of my mouth actually form a sentence)
[41] superstitions annoy me
[42] my favourite number is 13
[43] i was born on friday the 13th
[44] i play four instruments : piano, guitar, saxophone and drums. i'm not good at any of them.
[45] i love love love music. and movies.
[46] my favourite movie of all time is When Harry Met Sally
[47] i love jazzy drum riffs... the kind that go "tt-tt-ttst-tt-tt-tt-ttst"
[48] i love rainy gloomy English weather...
[49] ...although i do miss a good 'ol KL thunderstorm
[50] my childhood "when i grow up i wanna be" list ranges from actress, to hotelier, to neurologist. never once did i dream of becoming an architect.

well... that's it for now. i'd actually planned on going to bed by 12:00 tonight, so that my bio-rhythm could get back to normal. but then i received an e.mail survey from Emme, and i just cannot resist those. and then one thing led to another and before i knew it it's almost 5:00am and i'm still not in bed yet. so off to bed i go, i go.

now playing : something from Compendium

a cat-like moment

so... i did not go for crits today, felt like i didn't have enough to present. will go in on Monday instead, and by then i hope to have completed my site analysis. of course, i need to find a site first. heh.
anyways... right now all i feel like doing is stretchhhing and going "mmnyaaaa-aa". a good, proper muscle-extending, cartilage-popping stretch. i miss my old cat back home, and no-one does a stretch better than her. except she doesn't go "mmnyaaaa-aa". *sigh*

also, met up with D this evening for a short shopping stint (before the shops closed at 6) - bought a top for Manchester weekend-of-hedonistic-debauchery. and then dinner after, and then we went to see Closer. i just love DamienRice and his song just so fits the movie. and, there were some really nice BebelGilberto tracks too. and the movie wasn't bad either. actually it was pretty good.
drastic action needed to curb spending ! been spending quite a lot lately on impulse-driven purchases and attempts to cheer self up with ever-effective RetailTherapy. i am seriously considering wrapping my card up in cellophane, stuffing it in a fish and sticking that in the freezer. or, wrapping it up in an old sock and taping it to the under-side of my mattress. or, wrapping it up in bacon and ... or i could just give it to my LovelyFlatmate, ask her to hide it somewhere, and tell her that under No Circumstances Whatsoever should she hand it back to me. although that never works, cos i'm just too damn persuasive. and i am never too ashamed to beg.

major thing accomplished... i have had No caffeine At All today. # of caffeine pills ingested : 0. # of cups of coffee : 0. oh, actually i just remembered, i had a cup of coffee with desert tonight. damn.

well with that, i'm going to bed now. but before that... *stretch*mmnyaaaa-aa*stretch*

just had to do it.

now playing : Radian by Air, from 10,000 Hz

something's missing

it's time for another one of these posts.
just trying to figure out why things just don't seem to be working out recently. last semester went pretty well. designed 2 embassies in 10 weeks, something i thought would have been a near impossible task. granted, most nights it would've been considered luxurious for me to get 4 hours of sleep, but i enjoyed the stress. i loved the pressure. i embraced the challenge. i also found that i possess a potential to be borderline-OCD about the strangest things. this semester, it's my project. a topic that i chose. something that i really want to do. so what's stopping me ? where's the zest, the enthusiasm i had not 2 months ago ? can somebody please just tell me what button to push, what lever to pull, to get my head into fucking gear ?
on a slight up-note, i did some major impulsive shopping today. unfortunately Retail Therapy works wonders for this troubled soul. so i got myself a phone upgrade, replacing my T610 for the S700i. which has a wicked camera and a really nice screen. also bought me some new pants, for upcoming Manchester clubbing-weekend, planned in honour of galpal Bex's 26th. and there's no better picker-upper than finding the perfect pair of pants. sits on your hips at just the right place. grabs your ass in just the right way. perfect. for at least 20minutes today, i saw a glimpse of sunshine peeking through some dark gray clouds.

now playing : Janis Joplin's arse-kicking version of Summertime

29 hours and counting

Things I Did Today
[1] laundry (i ::cinta:: laundry day !)
[2] went to library to (finally) return long overdue book, and made substantial donation (i.e. paid huge library fine... hoping to get a shelf named in my honour by the end of the year)
[3] felt like dumbest person in uni after, when asked for reason behind voting for certain party to head Guild, i replied "They gave me a lollipop". which i am currently sucking on. go, More,More,More !
[4] grocery shopping
[5] read blogs
[6] watched one of my favourite movies of all time, starring one of my favourite actors of all time.

Things I Did Not Do Today
[1] prepare for presentation tomorrow

i think there are deeper issues than i just didn't feel like it lurking beneath.

now playing : Cinta by Flop Poppy

ch-ch-changes

God... is it Monday already ? Monday the 21st ? Monday the 21st, two days away from a presentation that i am Still not even coming close to being prepared for ? kill. me. now. although must say, it is through fault of no one else but mine. and my sense of duty as Queen of Procrastination. bad, bad, bad habit. must break out of.

spent most of week doing nothing work-related, instead tried to take mind off the fact that there was an assload of work to be done by being drunk, and hyper on caffeine. yes was a weekend of numbing mind with lots of alcohol. actually was an entire week (almost) of numbing mind with lots of alcohol. and also discovering the beauty of caffeine pills. realised a few weeks ago that the litres of sludge-like coffee that i pour down my throat daily was more than likely the cause of my not-so-baby-smooth complexion last semester. i'm blaming it on the coffee-oils. noticed after taking new-found caffeine pills that the wondrous effects of caffeine manifest even quicker, plus enjoy spot-free (almost) face. any blemishes easily concealed courtesy of Bobbi Brown and her magi-chemicals. now my only worry is death-by-caffeine-overdose. although after consulting with LovelyFlatmate who is also Doctor-to-be, as well as getting second opinion from Doctor-to-be #2 from downstairs, both claiming that death-by-caffeine-overdose is highly unlikely (however gently adding that i seriously do need to reduce caffeine intake) and that the most i'll suffer is an elevated heart rate, am now fearing possibility of death-by-over-excited heart.

also, spent earlier half of week being weepingly depressed. as in staying-in-room-feeling-sorry-for-self depressed. and wondering why feelings of self-pity and depression creep up ever so often, especially when there doesn't really seem to be any reason for said feelings to arise. so also spent earlier half of week feeling quite confused, and wondering whether yours truly should drag self to therapist and ramble about childhood of neglect and resentment which led to adolescent years of neglect and resentment resulting in present years of self-declared independence (except for Financial Support dependence) and yes, resentment. whereupon therapist would nod and say things like "Well how do you feel about that ?" when is actually thinking God not another one of these self-absorbed brats. nope. don't need that. anyway, abandoned thoughts of therapy after having a conversation with LovelyFlatmate a.k.a Doctor-to-be (who is currently attached to a hospice) about patients who have difficulty accepting the fact that death is near :

me : aren't there therapists to talk to them, help them ease their minds a little ?
LF : no, there's no point. waiting list for therapy is at least 2 months, and some of them don't even have that long.
me : [after 5 seconds of astounded silence] well that is not good.

how long would my waiting list be ?

anyway, seeing as it is a Brand New Week, and also bc i have not set any NewYear resolutions, i have come up with (yet another) list of Resolutions, Just Because :
[1] will reduce tendency to do Things That I Should Not Be Doing when i already have a lot of Things That I Really Need To Get Done
[2] will reduce alcohol consumption (actually cannot help but, as have exhausted supply of alcohol in flat)
[3] will refrain from replacing exhausted supply of alcohol in flat
[4] will refrain from buying too much fruit, as have spent some of this weekend throwing away lots of rotten fruit

now playing : Condor by Dave Grusin, from Three Days of the Condor

new-found life purpose

*deep contended sigh* for have just had the most gorgeously warm shower, and just washed eyeballs with refreshing eye drops (after having suppressed drop-of-whatever-falling-into-eye-and-potentially-blinding-me-phobia). and had yet another pick-me-up dosage of caffeine. maybe now i'll actually be able to Start Doing Some Work ? actually, No. because i have finally realised that my new-found Purpose In Life is to Watch All Supposedly Classic Movies And Determine Whether They Are Indeed As Classic As Everyone Thinks. so below, a list from imdb.com, of the 250 Best Movies Of Alltime, as determined by people who go to imdb.com and vote for their favourite movies. yes. well. in the spirit of keeping my goals attainable and also simply because i am just too lazy to type out all 250 movies, lets just say i'll watch 50 Supposedly Classic Movies instead.

[1] The Godfather
[2] The Shawshank Redemption
[3] The Lord of the Rings : The Return of the King (seen. not convinced what the fuss was all about)
[4] The Godfather Part II
[5] Shichinin No Samurai
[6] Schindler's List
[7] Casablanca (seen. how could i not love ?)
[8] The Lord of the Rings : The Fellowship of the Ring (seen. pretty impressed)
[9] Star Wars (seen. loved)
[10] The Lord of the Rings : The Two Towers (seen. okay-la)
[11] Citizen Kane
[12] One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
[13] Pulp Fiction (seen. loved)
[14] Star Wars Episode V : The Empire Strikes Back (seen. loved)
[15] Rear Window
[16] Dr. Strangelove
[17] The Usual Suspects
[18] Raiders of the Lost Ark
[19] The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
[20] Memento
[21] City of God
[22] 12 Angry Men
[23] North by Northwest
[24] Psycho
[25] Lawrence of Arabia
[26] It's a Wonderful Life
[27] Amelie (seen. loved)
[28] Once Upon a Time in the West
[29] The Silence of the Lambs (seen. loved)
[30] Goodfellas
[31] Sunset Blvd.
[32] Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
[33] American Beauty (seen. was okay)
[34] The Matrix (seen. was okay)
[35] Vertigo
[36] Apocalypse Now
[37] To Kill a Mockingbird (read the book lots of times. does that count ?)
[38] Fight Club
[39] Paths of Glory
[40] The Third Man
[41] Spirited Away (seen. loved. Hayao Miyazaki kicks ass)
[42] The Pianist (seen. loved. although was slightly depressed by)
[43] Taxi Driver
[44] Singin' in the Rain (seen. loved)
[45] Double Indemnity
[46] Das Boot
[47] M
[48] Some Like it Hot
[49] Chinatown
[50] Rashomon

so there we go. the 50 (minus some) movies that i will watch and review. although i must say... sad list. what's with all the Akira Kurosawa movies ? and where are the real classics like Gone With The Wind ? and Dirty Dancing and Grease ? and what about Breakfast at Tiffany's or Dial 'M' for Murder ? maybe have not chosen good list of Movies To See. but what the hell. there will be more Lists of Movies to come. and besides, highly doubt that Financial Supporters (a.k.a mum & dad) will financially support my new-found Life Purpose anyway. *sigh* back to work then.

today's quote : "Oi liang, moi miang" --- Melanie's grandma
now playing : This Kiss by Faith Hill

list #3

methinks it's time for another one of these : 5 Things That I Am Grateful For

[1] Olivia Lamb's e.mail, offering to answer any questions i had about women's refuges. however she couldn't authorise a visit to the refuge, for security and privacy reasons which is totally okay because...
[2] ...Ben's going to be the photographer for the official opening of AlRatna, a women's shelter in Salak, so i can experience said shelter vicariously through his photographs.
[3] the oppurtunity to catch up with Dennis & Darlina last night for dinner
[4] my headphones, which i absolutely love; and
[5] the water heater has been nice to me for the past 3 weeks now, giving me lovely just-nicely-warm showers, and not attempting to boil me alive. i knew we'd settle our differences.

...because sometimes you just need to remind yourself that while you're caught up in the dreariness of it all, life sometimes throws you a bone or two, and if you're not careful you might just not realise that it's there.

today's quote : "Too much of a good thing is wonderful" --- Armistead Maupin
now playing : Light Behind Windows by Llorca

it's just one of those days

Ever wondered, if it came to that, whether you could ? which way would you choose ? would it hurt ? would you feel anything at all ? could you ?

Ever wondered how they do it ? or whether every smile is fake. every joke composed. rehearsed. screaming for effect. every step carefully orchestrated. every time you go out, you face them with an armour and a sheild. so they'd know you're okay. so they'd think "Gee she's great, isn't she ? So put-together. So calm. So self-assured." so they wouldn't ask questions. why do they say "How are you?" when the only answer is "Fine." or "Are you okay?" when you can only say "Yes."

Ever wondered how it came to this ? how everything seems fine, but isn't, really. if it's just in your head. if you're just doing this for you. if you just want something to cry about. because you crave misery. you embrace gloom. how long would it take you to leave ? and how long could you stay away ?

Ever wondered how many people would be there ? how many would question, and ask why. how they never saw it coming, never thought you would. would they blame themselves ? would they think of words they could have said, things they could have done. would you ? would they hate you for leaving but still pray for your soul ?

Ever wondered how you could be so selfish ? so self-absorbed ? so proud ? so afraid. and if it really was just one of those days, when would it end ?

now playing : Day Dream by Pat Wroge

You may / may not know this...

Yesterday somebody said something to me that i realise has been a recurrent phrase in lots of conversations with my friends : "This is a side of you that I've never seen before." usually followed by : "Are you drunk ?" which, funnily enough, is usually the case. either that or suffering from severe caffeine deprivation. well anyway i realised that there are a lot of people out there who think they know me well, but don't really. and so for Their benefit, I present List No. 2 : Things You May / May Not Know About Me. subject to updatation.

[1] i am quite introspective. sometimes obsessively so.
[2] i don't really love coffee all that much. sometimes it makes me feel sick.
[3] i am a social smoker
[4] i make up words. like updatation. or for incasement. or malufying.
[5] my accent changes, depending on who i'm talking to.
[6] sometimes i hurt
[7] i can cook. i just don't like to.
[8] i talk to myself. sometimes i have whole lengthy conversations with me.
[9] i HaTe It WhEn PeOpLe TyPe LiKe ThIs
[10] or wen dey spellz dis way
[11] sometimes i seriously wonder if i'm doing the right course
[12] i am very much a scorpio. especially the negative traits.
[13] i once attended a lesbian party
[14] my bookshelves are full of pretentious books that i haven't read, or abandoned reading halfway
[15] i don't like myself very much. although i'm trying really hard to.
[16] some songs make me cry
[17] some movies make me cry too
[18] sometimes i play dumb. sometimes i really am.
[19] i know a whole bunch of useless facts, only no one bothers to ask
[20] i can sometimes be a bit of a snob
[21] it's really hard for me to tell people that i love them, although...
[22] ...one of my biggest fears is that the people i love may die without knowing that i do.
[23] i hate the taste of beer but sometimes i drink it anyway. especially when i'm broke.
[24] i am not an alcoholic. contrary to popular belief.
[25] i hate taking photos of me
[26] my favourite comedian is currently eddie izzard
[27] i can do quite a lot of things, and i know a little bit about many things, but i'm not a master of anything
[28] i like blue food (food that is blue in colour, in case anyone was wondering)
[29] i like cleaning the kitchen
[30] i prefer e.mail / text to speaking on the phone
[31] i am very brand-loyal
[32] i hated my name when i was a kid. sometimes i still do, just a little bit.
[33] i always pay sticker price bc i don't know how to bargain
[34] sometimes i can be a bit of a doormat
[35] but sometimes i can be a bit of a bitch
[36] i am quite certain that i'm my grandpa's favourite grandchild
[37] i know quite a bit of movie trivia, only no one bothers to ask
[38] i love buying kitchen utensils. although i don't cook.

So there you go. 38 Things you may / may not have known about me. at least that's all i can come up with now.

: a.n. just realised that there is a 100 Things About Me list going around some blogs, which i guess is kind of like this one. so although my list isn't even halfway to 100, i'll just keep adding on to it. sikit-sikit lama-lama menjadi bukit, people ! :

p.s : i know i said today's post would be all ranty but i'm not really in a fuckety mood right now so i'll find another day to get fucked out about.

today's quote : "Fuck context" --- Rem Koolhaas
now playing : That Day by Magic Number

but then again...

I just realised how sappy and incredibly cheesy today's post was. so just to prove that i'm not one of those girls, tomorrow's post will contain copious amounts of the word fuck. i promise.

now playing : Can I Be Your Man by Jinrai

ode to a boy

I don't have to say it; we all know what day it is today. and i was all prepared and ready to Rant&Rave about the commercialism behind TheDayWhichShallNotBeNamed. about the ridiculousness of setting aside one day as a "day of hearts" (quote from one of the weirdest Friendster e.mails that i have received) which does nothing but make people feel that they have to either :
[1] (if attached) spend an obscene amount of money on a gift (or, in the case of said person not having access to obscene amounts of money or just being plain cheap, perform a lavishly grand my-love-knows-no-depths gesture); or
[2] (if unattached) get assbbuppingly drunk and wallow in misery of singledom.
and it's a Monday. and 9 days away from a presentation that i am not even coming close to being prepared for. today was one of those classic i-wish-my-life-was-over-so-kill-me-now kind of days. but then I trudged to the kitchen to drown my sorrows in a pot of coffee, where i found a note with my name and "This is for you" written on it. on top of the note was a Mega Double Choc Muffin from one of the sweetest flatmates i have been blessed with. yep, doesn't take much to make my day. so i'll find another day to Rant&Rave; meanwhile allow me to present :

an ode (that doesn't rhyme) to a boy
:a.n. feb15 2005...or not. Yes, it's gone. Yes, i deleted it. just read it again today and decided that there is just no way i'm leaving something like that on my blog. so suffice it to say that ventings were vent, laundry was aired, and now it's sitting comfortably, hidden away somewhere in my computer. maybe next Valentine's i'll post it again:

today's quote : "She tapped her finger & nothing happened & she thought she had lost her magic, but it had only changed & it took her awhile to figure out" --- Brian Andreas
now playing : Busenfreund by Tosca

how to become Joyful

Last Sunday at church Jenny spoke about Celebration, and how we should always find a reason to celebrate and be happy about life, no matter how sad and depressing we think it is. she gave 7 steps towards achieving a joyful life and although i sat there thinking 'what a bunch of assbupp cheesism' i shall give it the benefit of the doubt and now put Step One (practice gratitude) into practice. and so here is a list of 5 Things That I Am Grateful For :

[1] the beautiful day outside; the sky is cloudy grey and it looks like it may rain soon.
[2] my long restful night of sleep.
[3] i have lots of fruits. so i shall not go hungry for a long time. unless they rot out on me.
[4] i have lots of coffee.
[5] the little white choc toblerone that Julia gave me last night, which i shall later eat with my coffee.

so did that make my day ? not really. honestly, it took me a while to think of 5 things that i could be thankful about. mostly because i kept thinking about the Things That Piss Me Off. but then, when i read about things like this, or this, it helps put things in perspective, and then i realise that maybe my life isn't as sad and depressing as i think it is. so here's to me learning to give assbupping cheesiness a chance, and appreciating the little things in life that i love.

today's quote : "We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, i do not know." --- WH Auden
now playing : Sade's Cherish The Day from The Best of Sade

a rose by any other

So I was surfing through some blogs today on blogger.com, and it occurred to me that out of the gazillions of blogs out there, every one has its own unique name. now i know what you're thinking : 'what a stupid thing to say; blogger won't let you call your blogsite something that someone else already has' but it's something to wonder about. i haven't come across any two (or more) blogs that have a similar blog name. and there are lots of interesting blog names out there, for example...

:pause:

Actually :rewind - erase previous statement: ... just as i was going to go off and look for some cool blog names that i could show you i found this : daily ramblings, which hey, sounds kind of like mine (deep intellectual philosophical ramblings) fine, so 'ramblings' is a common word, especially when a blog is really just a place for us self-indulgent narcissists to enlighten the rest of the online community with our thoughts on life, politics, world affairs, i.e. wax philosophic (or not) about things that other people probably don't care about anyway, like what i had for lunch. or, if no one ever visits your(my) site then you're(i'm) just rambling away to your(my)self; in which case this little nook in cyberspace becomes my very own personal narcissus' pool.

Anyways today was another total and complete bust, as far as work progress is concerned, thanks to my royal duties as Queen of Procrastination. well, i have the books opened, sketchbook ready and pen poised for action. as soon as i come back from my coffee break i shall definitely get some work done. sure.

today's quote : "something sufficiently toad-like squats in me too" --- Philip Larkin
now playing : Dvorak's Symphony No.9 "From The New World"

Bitten by the blug

So i've hopped back on the blog wagon, thanks to Mel and the fact that multiply refused to allow me to post my journal up. hopefully i'll be able to keep up this time, and not end up abandoning it like i did my other 2 blogs. great way to keep in touch with people though. this way i won't have to type out 5 e.mails with similar content to 5 different friends. so if any of my friends are reading, this is what's been going on in my life so far :

Had Chinese New Year dinner at Joshua's last night - steamboat style. not too bad but i honestly am not that hot about steamboat. company was ok, but left early to get home in time for DesperateHousewives. suppose it's the next best thing for these post-SexInTheCity times. sad, but even Julia is hooked on it, although i suspect she's just watching for Gardener John.

Currently working on my design thesis - the Psychology of Space; will be doing a shelter for abused women. lots of reading up ahead, also trying to line up interviews with someone from Sociology and Women's Aid or Refuge. suspect that it will be pretty hard getting them to let me visit a shelter - security surrounding it is usually quite tight. progress is Slow, thanks to the fact that I am the Queen of Procrastination.

Sarah recommended RetailTherapy to me a few weeks ago when i was deep down in the dumps. i think i may have gone a little overboard in taking her advice... i swear i can now draw out the layout plans for Zara, Warehouse and KarenMillen. the whole exchange rate concept has escaped me and my Visa screams everytime i open my (recently purchased) purse. the fact that i'm living smack in the middle of the city centre is not helping, although it's no use confining myself to my room because of the wonderful world of Online Shopping.

I watched Aladdin (the Disney cartoon) last week; copied from SzeKai's enormous library of downloaded movies. i think the last time i watched it was when i was 11 ? amazingly i still remember the lyrics to most of the songs, although i'm not all that surprised that i do since i probably spent most of Primary 5 / 6 singing them with Davina and Tracy. Sad, sad lives we once lived.

today's quote : "Time hangs like a noose before me" --- Grant Lee Phillips
now playing : Harry Connick Jr.'s But Not For Me from When Harry Met Sally

My loyal subject

I cannot begin to express how elated I am to receive news from you, my Beloved and Loyal Ambassador to the Great Unknown (a.k.a. Ausytralia). It has been so long since I last heard from you, I feared that wild kangaroos had perhaps captured you and kept you as their pet monkey.

I thank you for your gift of Grog. He is now typing out this letter that I am dictating to him, as I am currently otherwise occupied with other Queenly duties. Although I am very grateful for his well-formed abdominal and pectoral musculature, I must say that he is most unsatisfying as a masius. Also he does not spell so good. So, I hope that you will not be offended in my sending him back to the flesh market in Turkey. I had initially planned to fly him to Ausytralia to serve as your toe-nail picker but he begged me not to, screaming something about it being a fate worse than a thousand deaths whilst repeatedly scraping the skin off his chest. I must say, these Scantynovenians are a dramatic bunch. It was most disturbing witnessing his display, not to mention terribly messy for my poor maids to clean up.

Dearest Ambassador, the picture that you sent me, of you and your concerned puppy, filled me with much joy. It certainly brightened my day. Although, it did sadden me a smidge to think that that wasp caused horrendous damage to your face. Thankfully it missed that spot on your chin. Yes, my dear faithful servant, God spares us from complete harm and utter humiliation, even though it is only by a patch smaller than 5 grains of rice. That, by the way, was a wise quote from a wise man that I met whilst working at the Chicken Fair : dear old Lau Ah Pek, the kind gentleman managing the Chicken Liver And Other Innards stall next to mine.

I am so proud that you are now working as an Assistant Eyebrow Plucker in Singapore. You have reached new heights, as I knew you would. I hope that you find as much enlightenment in your days of eyebrow plucking as I did in my days of chicken fairing. As for me, I am currently experiencing the life of my people, or as you so aptly quoted a wise woman (me) by saying "To understand your people, you must Be your people". I work the corner of Bold and Renshaw Streets. My clients are lovely and the pay is good. At least, the pay would have been good if I charged any money for it, but as you know, I am exceedingly rich and money means nothing to me, so my services (as are yours) are Free Of Course. In fact, I am currently seeing to the needs of a very important customer, which is why Grog is typing this letter to you. I have so much fun and my clients are so grateful, they keep coming back, and they recommend friends too ! They have affectionately nick-named me as the Easy Floozy, which I'm certain is some form of higher distinction in this profession.

Well, I must draw this letter to a close. But before that, I do wish to discuss some matters of our Beloved country with you. The islands in the Himalayas is ready for you. I am pleased to inform you that the natives are awaiting the arrival of their new ruler. They have planned a great and lavish feast in your honour; I'm told that an exquisite menu of the highest standards is being prepared. The head cook is preparing his specialty - Chicken Gizzard Broth and Stewed Cow Udders with Fermented Cheese Sauce. Oh my mouth waters at the thought. I will mail the map of the islands to you, so you will be able to find it. I tried e-mailing it to your e-mail account, but I couldn't find the slot in my computer to stuff the map in.

Well, it has been a pleasure relaying my praise and gratitude to you. My exquisite buns are very pleased that you have served as a good and faithful Ambassador. You are most certainly a dedicated Maalysian and I am proud to have you as my citizen. Yes, you and I may be the only citizens in Maalysia, but we can still be a powerful country. Don't forget, "Two carrots, when placed in hot soup, will rise and float; conquering all the other vegetables in the pot". Wise words, from wise Lau Ah Pek. May his teachings guide us in our daily life.

Your most beautiful and venerable,
Queen of Maalysia

This is for you, Mel

Well I tried the multiply thing; wrote this long message to you but when I clicked on "save journal entry" I got an error message claiming that my "document has no content". What an insult. So I created a new blog here on blogger.com, especially for your viewing pleasure. So, enjoy.