God save the Queen('s vagina)

see, i started writing this post a few days ago. i was going to tell you all about how i went to see the Vagina Monologues (hence the title) last Wednesday. how i'd initially planned to see it 5 years ago when it was scheduled to play in KL, until the lovely folks at City Hall put an end to that. how joyful i was to find that it would play in Liverpool - one night only! - and how ecstatic i was to manage to get a ticket to see the show. and about how it was one of the best nights i have had so far, this year.

i also wanted to tell you all about how i went to see Babel. i wanted to say "You MUST see this film!" i wanted to say that this film has made me reaffirm my position on the whole "no more TV" stance i am taking (oh by the way did i mention that as of November 2006 i've voluntarily stopped watching TV for no real reason other than that there is too much shit on TV these days - shit i don't want to be paying £130 a year for).

but here's the thing: there is nothing else on my mind these days except my whole visa situation. it is really stressing me out, though i try not to think about it too much. i look around my room and wonder how to go about packing up and then shipping everything i've accumulated over the past 3 years of my life here. i've complained before about moving from one apartment to another on the other side of town, and now i have to move all the way to the other side of the world. the side of the world that bans things like the Vagina Monologues because it contains "controversial content", no matter how real or relevant it is. i will have to attend a hearing (!!) 2 weeks from now. it scares the shit out of me.

cos goddamn i hate packing.

sewer monsters would be appalled

Oops i guess there is something that needs explaining... i still have my old job, that is, my current job - Shop Assisting, in a Shop. Thing is, this is meant to be a transitionary job, something that feeds the rent and bills whilst i look for a real job - Architecting, in a Firm.

Well, now that that's cleared up, this is how my job interview went: good. did not trip, did not rip pants, etc. Met with the Director of the firm, and the office manager. Went through my portfolio, which they appeared to like, and i got good feedback from them about my work. After all that though, and a massive 2-day high, they called back and told me that i didn't get the job; said they needed someone with more work experience. Which really gripes my ass, because how am i supposed to gain work experience when no one will give me work?

Also, i sent in an application late last year to have my student visa extended, got my passport back a couple of weeks ago, but the extension was denied. So i met with a solicitor this week to work on an appeal against the decision. Sent all the forms off, and all i have to do now is wait til they set a court date for a hearing... fucking court yo!

So i don't know, i've had a sucky couple of weeks... actually, a pretty fucky couple of years now. i'm guessing one day, maybe a long way from now, i'll look back at this time and laugh. or reflect on how experiences like this helped me grow and all that shit. or maybe not.

I suppose good things have happened too... it's just taking me a little bit longer to think what.

Oh, my kitchen floor is finally here! it actually arrived almost a month ago, i just haven't had the time to fit it in yet. it's a marbley-looking light tan colour linoleum, and it shouldn't be all that hard to fit in. i'm just wondering how i'll get a 4-m long roll of floor up a flight of stairs and into the narrow corridor of my hallway...

Speaking of my kitchen, it is currently in a dreadful state. tea-stained rings on the counter top, 2-week old dishes in the sink, week old coffee in the coffee maker. i think i have milk in the fridge that can't be called milk anymore.

shoulders hunched, collars up

i have spent most of January thinking about most of 2006. the worst event of last year was my grandmother's death, and also the fact that i couldn't be home with her when she was dying, or for her funeral. i sometimes find myself thinking about her as if she were still alive - and then catching myself when i remember that she's gone.

the best part of 2006, i think, was me getting a job (albeit being disgustingly underpaid) and finally being able to cut myself off of my dad's bank account. of course, if i really needed the money, i know that it would only take a phone call - but i really hope i won't have to anymore.

i had a good day today... i spent most of the later half of 2006 moaning about not being able to get a job yet not doing anything much about it - well, a few days ago i finally picked up the phone and called up a recruitment agency a friend of mine recommended. i met with a consultant this afternoon, and she's already got me an interview lined up for Monday. after speaking to her on the phone the other day i had a feeling things would be okay... we share the same birthday, and she has the same name as my cat (although i didn't tell her about that... i wasn't sure how she would feel about sharing a name with a cat). i am already nervous about the interview... it will be my first proper interview ever! what if the directors don't like what i wear? what if it rains that morning and my hair ends up all ratty and messy? what if i can't think of any way i can be of use to the company? what if i trip over something and rip my pants?

tomorrow (also another first) i'm seeing the dentist... first time in 2 years. well, actually, second time: i had a check-up last Thursday. turns out i have one cavity, one potential cavity and a mouth full of wonky wisdom teeth that don't seem to be growing in the right direction. also, caffeine and nicotine have left my teeth stained yellowy so i will also need a scale and polish. i don't mind dentists... in fact i find them soothing. i might take a nap while she's polishing away.

you know what i miss? jungle trekking. i miss walking through the jungles and moaning about the heat and mosquito bites. i don't know why, but i just watched The Bridge On the River Kwai tonight and i wished i were in a rainforest somewhere swashbuckling away at unruly bamboo with a parang.

so sorry!

i know it seems like i only post when i get a "where have you been" message and i know i haven't posted in a long long long long while but i will will will post something soon! most likely after Thursday. or maybe even tomorrow night! so sorry to those of you who have been checking back and still finding that old early Jan post! no excuses except laziness i'm afraid!

diddle me this

i have just had the most pleasantly relaxing day. i have spent almost the entire day in bed - wrapped up in two duvets, a spread-out sarong and two fleece throws. hot water bottles under the covers and the gas fire on. warm, toasty, a hot cup of mocha by the bed. bless my blissful self!

it was my day off today; i have tomorrow off as well. i was just looking through my diary last night and realised that i haven't had a proper, rest-filled day in about 6 weeks! sure, i haven't been working everyday for 6 straight weeks, but when i do get a day off (i've been working 6-day weeks, thanks to the pre- and post-Christmas rush), it has been spent running around getting errands done - trips to the bank, post office, people to call/see... so today, today was wonderful.

i'm off tomorrow too; but in contrast to today i will instead be running around town like a headless chicken.